Secrets to steal from couples in love (Part 2)

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Safe eroticism
Safe eroticism

Get professional help when you need it

“I’m not Cinderella, and he’s not Prince Charming,” says Sherri. “Glitches along the way are normal because it’s hard to live together all these years. We went to a marriage counselor at one point because we were going in different directions and needed professional help. You always have to keep working on relationship.”

 Expect that there will be crises

 “Life is going to hit you with curve balls,” insists Evelyn Brier, whose husband, Alan, started out as a childhood friend. They married when they reconnected after college. “But you have to stick it out. People give up too soon, too easily. It’s how you handle those lows together that makes the difference in life. There will be strains, yet it gets easier, and in many ways, better.”
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Never stop showing affection

Never stop showing affection

Fifty-three years after they walked the aisle, the Briers still grab each other’s hands. “If you continue holding hands and you’re content, that’s what’s important,” says the mother of four. “Is the sex going to be what it was when you first got married? No, it changes and is replaced with things just as satisfying and fulfilling.”

Talk out issues in person

Texting, emailing, and messaging don’t make couples’ communication any clearer, says Judy Terry. Before smartphones, “you either said something or you didn’t,” when conflicts came up. So the mom of four and husband Harold speak up because hashing out problems via keyboard is taking the “easy way out rather than talking about it face-to-face.”

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Talk out issues in person

Have a standing date — without the kids

“When you have children and everything revolves around them, you see a lot of divorces once they leave home,” says Judy, 72, who goes out on a breakfast date every Friday morning with Harold, 75. “We don’t let anything interrupt that. It gets us started that day, then mostly we do everything together afterward.” The outing is special, she adds, “Because it’s a time for us to talk and feel close together.”

History doesn’t have to be repeated

“I came from a divorced family and didn’t want that to happen to our kids,” says Judy, who has been married to Harold for 55 years. The Lakewood, Colorado, parents of four were neighbors and tied the knot when Judy was an 18-year-old high school student. “So I think from that perspective you try a lot harder because you don’t want your kids to go through what you did.”